Day 22

A picture of something you wish you were better at.

Communicating how I feel.

Days 20 and 21

Day 20 - A picture of somewhere you'd love to travel.

All over Europe. 

 
Day 21 - A picture of something you wish you could forget.

This year so far - except for the times with Saria. It's just been a roller coaster and I wish I could change so many decisions I've made, so many things I've done. 

I worked out today that the way you are treating me, is not the way I want to be treated.
It's hard to feel wanted when you look at others more.
It's hard to read the things you say to other girls.
It's hard to be around you.
I'm not going to let this happen anymore.
I'm going to stand up for myself.
Because I want to be wanted because I am me, not because I'm a root.

I miss

being someone's everything.

Day 19

Day 19 - A picture of yourself as a baby.

Officially up to date.

Day 18

Day 18 - A picture of your biggest insecurity.

My body.

Day 17

Day 17 - A picture of something that has made a huge impact on your life recently.
Having a child.
:)

Day 16

Day 16 - A picture of someone who inspires you.
Stephen Fry. For all the reasons behind why I'd also like to be him for a day.

Day 15

Day 15 - A picture of something you want to do before you die.

Visit Europe - especially Paris. :)

Day 14

A picture of someone you could never imagine your life without.
:)

I love Saria Lucy.

Day 13

Day 13 - A picture of your favorite band or artist.

 Ok, so my favourite band is Placebo, but Ville Valo is by far my favourite ARTIST. I love his songs, his voice, his face, Man... I would just do wicked wicked things to him. Over and over.

Day 8 Music Challenge

Day 8 - A song you know all the words too.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nbsaHCR1nXI

The Matches - Wake the Sun.

Just for one particular blog stalker.

Ranga hair!

After everything.

Everything we have gone through. 
All the fights we have had.
All the heartache we have caused each other.
I just can't get over it.





We are retarded. :(

Days 5,6 and 7 Music challenge.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hHRx_o7GO18

Day 05 - A song that reminds you of somebody - This song ALWAYS reminds me of Munky Langlands. :D I don't know why THIS particular mindless self indulgence song is the one that does it... but :) 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NR7dG_m3MsI 

Day 06 - A song that reminds you of somewhere - This song reminds me of my first Soundwave experience. Loved seeing these guys live and enjoyed the whole day, even if I did have a massive headache for most of it. :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FHh86ySgKrA 

Day 07 - A song that reminds you of a certain event (Pretty much what I did for day 06 but oh well)...
This song reminds me of a not so good event. :P I'd be quite happy never to listen to this song again.

Day 12

Day 12 - A picture of something you love.
SUSHI! Need I say more?

Day 11

Day 11 - A picture of something you hate.

Young children put into the music industry with CRAP songs, who act like adults and who should be at home doing their homework!!!!!!!!!!! :D

Day 10

Day 10 - A picture of the person you do the most messed up things with.
My amazing Boofy. I love this girl more than life. She has been the friend that I do the messed up shit with for as long as I can remember.
Moonwalker, 3 day lasagne, camping, girlfriends, porn, streaking, drugs, alcohol. She is the best influence on me. XD
I miss her and the old times so much.

Day 09

Day 09 - A picture of the person who has gotten you through the most.

I've put a picture of my mother with my gorgeous daughter, because mum has been the one person that has been there for me through everything. No matter how stupid, difficult or boring it is. :P And I must say I love her so much for being an amazing mother and letting me fall into her arms so many times.

But I also have to say that I wouldn't have gotten through the past six months if it wasn't for my precious little bundle, who has made my heart full of joy with every smile, every cuddle and every kiss. 

Day 4 Music Challenge.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_AgPfKkHpHc

Day 04 - A song that makes you sad.

It really hits home a lot.
Dallas Green should come and sing to me, then it won't make me sad... XD

It's confusing which one to go with really.

OR

I just need to have a rant really.

So there has been this issue that has been playing in my mind the last few days and I've reached a point where I need to have a good bitch about it to get it off my chest. And that is when people generalise a person. Give them a label and don't get to know them first.
For example - Racist terms. You may have had issues with a select couple of people who are a different race to you, but that doesn't mean that that whole race are like that. I know personally that I have had more issues with caucasians than any other race. But I don't place us all under that label.
Another example. Being labelled bad news because you are a single mum. I mean seriously, not every young single mum is just a woman who got knocked up by a stranger who had her kid because she thought the baby bonus would be awesome. I'm certainly not like that. I was in a relationship with someone that I thought I would be with forever and we both decided after our child was born that we were better parents when we weren't trying to be a couple as well. I am head over heels in love with my daughter and will always put her before myself.
Yet, I've been judged. And am now a "no-go" zone. Woopdy freaking doo.
I wish people wouldn't dislike someone, or not trust someone, because of their situation, race, gender, sexual orientation. Just makes me so angry. 
Get to know the person first before you judge them!!!
That mum might just be the nicest person you could meet.
That young man might be the most polite person you have ever spoken too.
Don't judge a book by it's cover!
That's my little rant. :D

Day 08

Day 08 - A picture that makes you laugh

Yes. That is exactly what you think. He has been caught humping a pillow.

Day 07

Day 07 - A picture of your night.

Yep. I stuffed my face with the family and Maty... We then went out for icecream but I didn't take photos. An amazing night had by all... pfft.

Day 2 and 3 Music Challenge.

Day 2 - Your least favourite song - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CD2LRROpph0

Rebecca Black - Friday 

I'm sorry, but this song takes the cake... shoves it into it's own face, then dances around like a hippy. Horrible, horrible, horrible.

Any other songs I hated are good in my books now. XD

 

Day 3 - A song that makes you happy - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xtiu3CA2KUU

 The Beatles - Yellow Submarine.  

Day 1 Music Challenge

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e_Ldgz1UJVs

Placebo - The Bitter End.

I love a lot of songs, but this is by far my all time favourite.

Also doing this...

30 Day Song Challenge.

day 01 - your favorite song
day 02 - your least favorite song
day 03 - a song that makes you happy
day 04 - a song that makes you sad
day 05 - a song that reminds you of someone
day 06 - a song that reminds you of somewhere
day 07 - a song that reminds you of a certain event
day 08 - a song that you know all the words to
day 09 - a song that you can dance to
day 10 - a song that makes you fall asleep
day 11 - a song from your favorite band
day 12 - a song from a band you hate
day 13 - a song that is a guilty pleasure
day 14 - a song that no one would expect you to love
day 15 - a song that describes you
day 16 - a song that you used to love but now hate
day 17 - a song that you hear often on the radio
day 18 - a song that you wish you heard on the radio
day 19 - a song from your favorite album
day 20 - a song that you listen to when you’re angry
day 21 - a song that you listen to when you’re happy
day 22 - a song that you listen to when you’re sad
day 23 - a song that you want to play at your wedding
day 24 - a song that you want to play at your funeral
day 25 - a song that makes you laugh
day 26 - a song that you can play on an instrument
day 27 - a song that you wish you could play
day 28 - a song that makes you feel guilty
day 29 - a song from your childhood
day 30 - your favorite song at this time last year

I'm doing it on Facebook but I thought I'd do it on here too. :)

Day 06

Day 06 - A picture of a person you'd love to trade places with for a day.

I know that this may be a peculiar choice, a lot of people would probably choose movie stars, or the wife of the celebrity they crush on. I choose Stephen Fry because I am in awe of him.

I would love to spend a day knowing just how it feels to be Stephen Fry. I am reading one of his biographies at the moment and it has inspired even more of a love for the man.


I would love to know how his brain works. He inspires me and enforces the fact that you could go through so much in your life and still become a sane, wonderful person at the end.

Plus, I'd make sure it was a day they were filming an episode of QI, so I could meet Alan Davies *drool*

Day 05

Day 05 - A picture of your favorite memory.

Seeing my daughter for the first time.

I...

don't know if I can continue to try and stop myself from falling head over heels in love with you. 

Day 04

Day 04 - A picture of your most treasured item.

Saria Lucy. I could lose everything else and it wouldn't matter.

Day 03

Day 03 - A picture of the cast from your favorite show.

The Mighty Boosh.
It makes me giggle... cackle... smile... and turned on (hello Noel Fielding XD)
Great show.


"I'M OLD GREGG!!"

Day 02

Day 02 - A picture of you and the person you have been close with for the longest.

My mother.
Since as long as I remember, she has been my rock.
We've had our up's and down's... but she has been an amazing mother, and the best friend I could ever ask for.

All I need to do is look at this face, and I'm the happiest person alive. 

Saria Lucy - I love you more than life.

Day 01

Day 01 - A picture of yourself with fifteen facts.


1. I am emotionally unstable.
2. I fall in love way too quickly.
3. I fall out of love just as quickly.
4. I'm way too insecure.
5. I enjoy disco's.... (inside joke)
6. I have learnt to turn my phone on silent when I go to bed because EVERYONE texts me as soon as I've fallen asleep.
7. I have an insane love for sugar.
8. I've had many sexual partners, a lot I regret.
9. I want what I can't have.
10. I love my job and would do it all day every day.
11. I am pretty obsessed with Patrick from Spongebob. I even considered getting him tattooed on me once.
12. I have the worst memory. Seriously.
13. There are moments where I can be completely random and funny, at other times I just can't think of anything funny and am way too serious.
14. I hate my body, and focus on the imperfections.
15. I live for Saria.

30 days. I intend on doing this. :D

Day 01 - A picture of yourself with fifteen facts.
Day 02 - A picture of you and the person you have been close with for the longest.
Day 03 - A picture of the cast from your favorite show.
Day 04 - A picture of your most treasured item.
Day 05 - A picture of your favorite memory.
Day 06 - A picture of a person you'd love to trade places with for a day.
Day 07 - A picture of your night.
Day 08 - A picture that makes you laugh.
Day 09 - A picture of the person who has gotten you through the most.
Day 10 - A picture of the person you do the most messed up things with.
Day 11 - A picture of something you hate.
Day 12 - A picture of something you love.
Day 13 - A picture of your favorite band or artist.
Day 14 - A picture of someone you could never imagine your life without.
Day 15 - A picture of something you want to do before you die.
Day 16 - A picture of someone who inspires you.
Day 17 - A picture of something that has made a huge impact on your life recently.
Day 18 - A picture of your biggest insecurity.
Day 19 - A picture of you when you were little.
Day 20 - A picture of somewhere you'd love to travel.
Day 21 - A picture of something you wish you could forget.
Day 22 - A picture of something you wish you were better at.
Day 23 - A picture of your favorite book.
Day 24 - A picture of something you wish you could change.
Day 25 - A picture of your day.
Day 26 - A picture of something that means a lot to you.
Day 27 - A picture of yourself and a family member.
Day 28 - A picture of something you're afraid of.
Day 29 - A picture that can always make you smile.
Day 30 - A picture of someone you miss

It's insane really...

Just how much one tiny, insignificant thing that a person of no real importance says, can make such a huge difference to your self esteem.
I was thinking about it the other day. I have an ex, who was a total utter douche bag - in the worst form of the word. I honestly have no idea what I was thinking being with him, but I was young and stupid. Anyway, that is of no importance, he is so meaningless nowadays to me.
BUT... Words that he said while we were together still haunt me today. My self esteem is so bruised from the things he said.
I am so paranoid of certain things about my body because he would complain about them all the time.
E.G. Hair. Have you ever tried being with the person you thought you loved while they spent the whole time telling you to start shaving because it was disgusting?
And now I wonder why I get so paranoid if I'm not completely bare.
Maybe too much info, but it's been bugging me the last couple of days.
How can someone so totally insignificant, manage to make me completely petrified of letting anyone close if I haven't been to see the wax lady?

Has anyone else ever had to deal with shit like that? What can you do to get over it? I'd love to know.